tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-91124572521447682472011-10-05T04:54:12.480-07:00Shashinoreply@blogger.comBlogger51100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9112457252144768247.post-52302884446208243742013-10-05T00:25:00.000-07:002011-10-05T00:51:22.342-07:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Every morning, I get up at 6; clean my <b style="color: black;">tooth</b><br />take breakfast; and go to work.<br /><br />She <b style="color: black;">is</b> are like traveling by bus.<br /><br />Sir, do you know, how to <b style="color: black;">drive</b> a bike..<br />He started laughing at me, than told me he told me that we do not drive a bike we ride a bike and drive a car!<br /><br />I haven't had any <b style="color: black;">male</b> for more than a week!<br /><br />Can you tell me that is it the last <b style="color: black;">shit</b> of today?<br /><br />Ruby has a long black hair.<br />John has short fair <b style="color: black;">hairs</b>.<br /><br />When I reached my residence, I had a <b style="color: black;">massage</b> on my answering machine!</div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/9112457252144768247-5230288444620824374?l=amusingenglish.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Shashinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9112457252144768247.post-21053003169206196452011-10-05T04:53:00.000-07:002011-10-05T04:53:40.393-07:00Do pilots take crash-courses?<br /><br />Why do they call it 'chili' if it's hot?<br /><br />Why do the signs that say "Slow Children" have a picture of a running child?<br /><br />If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?<br /><br />Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?<br /><br />If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look the way they do?<br /><br />Does that screwdriver really belong to Phillip?<br /><br />Why is the third hand on a clock called a second hand?<br /><br />If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made out of?<br /><br />How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?<br /><br />How come wrong numbers are never busy?<br /><br />How do you get off a non-stop flight?<br /><br />Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers?<br /><br />Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?<br /><br />Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?<br /><br />How do blind people know when they are done wiping?<br /><br />Do people in Australia call the rest of the world 'up over'?<br /><br />If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?<br /><br />If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?<br /><br />If cats and dogs didn't have fur would we still pet them?<br /><br />Does killing time damage eternity?<br /><br />Why is it that night falls but day breaks?<br /><br />If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?<br /><br />Did Noah keep his bees in archives?<br /><br />If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?<br /><br />If a candle factory burns down, does everyone just stand around and sing 'Happy Birthday?'<br /><br />Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game," when we are already there?<br /><br />Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors?<br /><br />If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/9112457252144768247-2105300316920619645?l=amusingenglish.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Shashinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9112457252144768247.post-20411216873413448442011-10-05T04:45:00.000-07:002011-10-05T04:45:40.675-07:00In Minnesota it is illegal to cross state lines with a duck on your head.<br /><br />It's impossible to get water out of a rimless tire.<br /><br />In Indiana it is illegal to ride public transportation for at least 30 minutes after eating garlic.<br /><br />Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.<br /><br />A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.<br /><br />Did you know that you are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider?<br /><br />A rhinoceros horn is made of compacted hair.<br /><br />The shortest war in history was between Zanzibar and England in 1896. Zanzibar surrendered after 38 minutes.<br /><br />A polar bear's skin is black. Its fur is not white, but actually clear.<br /><br />Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.<br /><br />Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants.<br /><br />Marilyn Monroe had six toes.<br /><br />Women blink nearly twice as much as men.<br /><br />More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes.<br /><br />Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.<br /><br />Shakespeare invented the words "assassination" and "bump".<br /><br />If you keep a Goldfish in the dark room, it will eventually turn white.<br /><br />China has more English speakers than the United States.<br /><br />The electric chair was invented by a dentist.<br /><br />Vatican City is the smallest country in the world, with a population of 1,000 and a size 108.7 acres.<br /><br />The longest town name in the world has 167 letters.<br /><br />You share your birthday with at least 9 million other people in the world.<br /><br />"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.<br /><br />The word "lethologica" describes the state of not being able to remember the word you want.<br /><br />The longest word in the English language is 1909 letters long and it refers to a distinct part of DNA.<br /><br />The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one-mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.<br /><br />No president of the United States was an only child.<br /><br />There's no Betty Rubble in Flintstones Chewable Vitamins.<br /><br />The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.<br /><br />The pop you get when you crack your knuckles is actually a bubble of gas bursting.<br /><br />The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.<br /><br />101 Dalmatians and Peter Pan (Wendy) are the only two Disney cartoon features with both parents who are present and don't die throughout the movie.<br /><br />Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/9112457252144768247-2041121687341344844?l=amusingenglish.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Shashinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9112457252144768247.post-39519501937269970262011-10-05T04:40:00.000-07:002011-10-05T04:40:49.418-07:00Would a fly without wings be called a walk?<br /><br />Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?<br /><br />Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?<br /><br />If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?<br /><br />The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.<br /><br />I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.<br /><br />If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?<br /><br />Is there another word for synonym?<br /><br />Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"<br /><br />Where do forest rangers go to 'get away from it all?'<br /><br />What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?<br /><br />If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?<br /><br />If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him...is he still wrong?<br /><br />If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?<br /><br />Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?<br />If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?<br /><br />Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?<br /><br />Do pediatricians play miniature golf on Wednesdays?<br /><br />If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?<br /><br />Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?<br /><br />Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it!<br /><br />some preety intresting(or not,just unusuall)things:<br /><br />The venom in a Daddy Longlegs spider is more poisonous than a Black Widow's or a Brown Recluse, but they cannot bite humans because their jaws won't open wide enough.<br /><br />If you toss a penny 10,000 times, it will not be heads 5,000 times, but more like 4950. The heads picture weighs more, so it ends up on the bottom.<br /><br />Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.<br /><br />A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.<br /><br />On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.<br /><br />The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.<br /><br />If God dropped acid, would he see people?<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/9112457252144768247-3951950193726997026?l=amusingenglish.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Shashinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9112457252144768247.post-21103141563395044412011-10-05T00:50:00.000-07:002011-10-05T00:50:39.694-07:00<a href="http://1jokeaday.blogspot.com/" target="_new">1 Joke a Day</a><p/><a href="http://jenakajokes.blogspot.com/" target="_new">Jenaka Jokes</a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/9112457252144768247-2110314156339504441?l=amusingenglish.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Shashinoreply@blogger.com